Path That Will Lead Me Home

By Zaida González —

As far back as I can remember, I have had a desire and searched within myself to find meaning in my life.  The concept of reincarnation was not new to me as I have always thought it existed. My logic for sustaining this idea was very primitive, but I believe this knowledge was rooted deep within my mind for many years.

I am of humble origins and the oldest with two younger brothers, Daniel who was born just a year after me and then, came my brother Robert, sixteen years after.

I remember my mother practicing the Catholic religion in her own way: she didn’t go to mass, but every Ash Wednesday she would go to the Basilica of Saint Teresa in Caracas, Venezuela to fulfill the promise of visiting the church during Holy Week she had made to the Nazarene of Saint Paul* (a statue of Jesus carrying his cross) when my brother Daniel became gravely ill.  My brother’s recovery from his illness was miraculous and he never suffered from it again.  My mother was a very generous and cooperative person as she enjoyed helping others and was very dedicated to her responsibilities as a housewife.

My father was not religious at all, although he acknowledges the existence of God, and he always pray to Him before going to bed.  Currently he’s 85 and enjoys working.  He has always had a strong sense of discipline and has worked hard since he was very young.  From him, I learned to be disciplined and work hard.

As I grew up, during my adolescence, I suffered many trials and adverse circumstances, but I never stopped looking for answers to the things that happened to me. I never lost faith in God and much less in Jesus.  I recall having always had a crucifix in my room and I would kiss it whenever I would go to work or study. I would make the sign of the cross many times as I was never sure if I had already done it and I didn’t want to feel unprotected.  I did the same on the day of the earthquake in 1969 in Caracas, when I felt that the earth was going to crack open and swallow me whole; my crucifix was there with me as an inseparable companion.

When I started working at 17, I became interested in self-help books.  I read many of them and thought that they could help me to improve the conditions of my life and help me leave the shell, so to speak, and I was very shy; I am still.  But intuitively, I knew that I had to prepare myself to speak in public to offer a higher service to the world.

More books came and went, like those of Connie Mendez, who brought Metaphysics and the I AM movement to Venezuela.  She translated Saint Germain’s books, I Am Discourses, Unveiled Mysteries and The Magic Presence and made them available to many people. However, I started with one she had written herself and I would write down in my notebook all the I AM affirmations I could find in the book.

Many years later in 1990, I went to my first metaphysical course that I found out about through a newspaper ad. I recently had left the female chorus I belonged to and, after coming back from a tour through Europe, I decided I wanted to do something different.  I loved being in the chorus, but it was very demanding, as I labored hard during the week and rehearsed on the weekends. I decided to switch from singing to metaphysics.

Metaphysics opened a whole new, unknown world for me. I gave classes for beginners and read as much as I could on the subject. My interest in learning more about the Masters and getting to know them better increased. Metaphysics was the path that opened the doors to the teachings of the Ascended Masters.

Zaida in Glastonbury, Montana

The metaphysical group I was in recommended that I get The Science of the Spoken Word. I read it avidly while away on a trip that I had planned to a solitary beach on a well-known archipelago of Venezuela called Los Roques.  It was the ideal atmosphere that blended well with the book – of which I must confess, I understood very little.

Even so, the words of Isaias 45:11 stayed with me: “Ask me of things to come; will you command me concerning my children and the work of my hands?”  This passage motivated me to give the decrees found in the book and got me into the habit of fervently asking God to protect my well-being and that of my loved ones.

In 1994, the metaphysical group invited me to go to Montana.  I had become a Keeper of the Flame the year before, so I immediately planned my vacation to go to the Summer Conference that would be held there.  People would ask me why I had chosen such a remote place.  They didn’t get it, but I was very happy to make that trip to the place of great encounters – and initiations.

A whole new outlook was unveiled before me: my encounter with a live Messenger. I already had read a few dictations given from The Bridge of Freedom and I always asked myself why the masters had stopped giving messages in the fifties.

My heart was bursting so much such joy as I listened to the dictations that I felt as I was in paradise.  The lectures offered afterward left an indelible mark on my whole being.  Although I must admit that, at first, I found most of the calls people shouted very strange and even annoying.  But the simple fact of experimenting with the decrees, the dictations and the teachings firsthand, represented a whole new dimension in my spiritual search. I could sense that I was in the place that would take me back Home.

The following year, in 1995, after resigning from my position as Administrative Manager of an aircraft maintenance company, I went back to Montana to participate in the Freedom Conference and then in Summit University for eight weeks. Day in and day out, I found myself eager to see the Messenger giving her live classes. Eventually I began to understand much about my life, my spiritual path, and the knowledge of seeing that I would go Home after obtaining the merits necessary for my reunion with God.

During that period, I pondered on applying for work there to be a part of the staff. I did so, and Mother announced my acceptance during the reception of the SU President. The following year, I flew to Montana to join the staff and I was finally able to be a part of a religious organization and work there!

 

Leading a choir at King Arthur's Court

I participated in the Darshans with the Messenger in 1997, which is a memorable year for many of us because of the direct contact with Mother and the teachings she transmitted while in the company of El Morya. What a delight! After the encounters with the Messenger, I would go back to my room full of joy and feeling grateful from having experimented firsthand, the wisdom, love and knowledge of Elizabeth Clare Prophet guided by the hand of El Morya.

All of this had a profound effect on me. Looking back at my childhood, I now understood why I had experienced such trials throughout it. Those experiences were the passport to balancing the necessary karma for beginning my training in the ministry in 1997.

I moved to Colombia in 1999 to coordinate The Ministry Training Program there, since the minister in charge was leaving the organization. In 2003, I was ordained a Minister. During that period, I worked for Church Universal and Triumphant until 2008.  I went back to the Inner Retreat in 2014, where the masters asked me to do my sacred labor, this time in the area of translations; a position that I love, and which has given me as much satisfaction as blessed tests.

Blessing of being with Guru Ma

I thank God for every learning opportunity He offers me each day; the initiations, the fulfilling experiences, the possibility to accept those things still incomprehensible to me and for being surrounded by these lovely mountains and the wonderful people who accompany me in this spiritual journey back Home.

I AM,

Zaida

* There is a legend behind the statue, the Nazarene of St. Paul. After the artist finished his work, Jesus appeared to him and said, “Where you have seen me that so perfect you have made me.” It was made in Spain.

Nazareno de San Pablo

Around 1697, Caracas was struck with an epidemic of scurvy. By popular demand, the image was taken out in supplication. During the procession as the statue went through a garden planted with lemon trees near the church, San Pablo, a bunch of lemons became entangled between the crown of thorns of the Nazarene and some dropped to the ground. The devotees collected the lemons, giving them as medicine to the sick, who were then healed promptly.

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